How's Your humpday?

• Got the guy at Starbucks to give me a free coffee for showing him my boob. For 2 boobs, he said I write my own ticket.
• Seriously contemplated buying a roll of pennies and letting them ride at the wishing well down my street.
• Gave human resources a heads up that the government has given me "special priveledges" to not have taxes taken out of my check.
• Wondered where Capris Suns fit into the new food pyramid.
• Hired someone to host my birthday bash.
• With only 2 days to go, I have absolutely decided on my #1 birthday wish.
• Called Jerry Lewis to see if he would consider a Save Stacey Telethon.
• Found a way to get cheaper rent here in Maine.
• Accidentally typed in "webshits.com" instead of "webshots.com" and was mortified.
• Got super angry that there is a complete library of all OC episodes on DVD but NOT 90210. Where do people get off?
• Re-wrote the happy birthday song to include the the phrase "old wrinkled ass."

Is it just me or does Jessica Simpson's dad creep anyone else out? Just a thought. If we are not careful he could run for President.